16 May 2007

Name and Shame...

Apologies for the cheesy title, but I couldn't resist...

This is a really interesting article on the issue of taking your husband's name, and naming your child. Like Bridget Appleby, I have been surprised at the amount of female friends who have gone back to the tradition of taking their husband's surname when getting married. She goes on to talk about her reasons for wanting to give her daughter her own surname. I've discussed this with many of you before, does it really matter as we're all named after our fathers anyway or is it about personal identity? I just don't understand why someone would want to change their name completely. How do you feel about it?

5 comments:

Katherine said...

I wonder about this often, and still don't know what I may choose. Changing my name for professional purposes would be utterly foolish as I've built up a body of commentary and so forth in my name, but I want to share a name with my future husband and children. We could pick one from the ether, of course, or choose to go double-barrelled or hybrid, but those options just seem so lame. I can't think of any satisfactory solution.

woodscolt said...

I'm also wondering about this, esp as my partner (and this seems quite a common attitude) seems to think that giving our (future) children a name other than his would be unnecessary, or ostentatiously militant, or something. I think generally there's an attitude that because a lot of feminist victories have been won, issues like names are meaningless, or just brought up by women wanting to be awkward.

For my part, I like my surname, it's very rare, and there's a nice little piece of family history behind it. As one of four children only one of whom is male, I'd be sorry if the name died out.

T said...

There just isn't a satisfactory solution, is there? I'd want some kind of identification with any children I might have. And my partner for that matter. But I just couldn't bring myself to change my name completely, it's importanat to my identity and it's not a common name, even in my parents' part of the world. It's interesting that the naming of children after their father is never ever questioned in heterosexual relationships. Like it's a step too far somehow...

Brunette said...

I'm getting married in December and find it amazing how many people automatically assume that I'll be taking MrB's name. I'm even being referred to as the future-Mrs-etc.

I love my surname - it's a massive part of my identity - particularly as I am from a totally different culture and background from MrB. I don't particularly want a double-barrelled surname, nor do I want my children to have a different surname from me.

AuntieMabel said...

This is an interesting one. I've never liked my name anyway, so I don't think I'd be that arsed about changing it. But it's still *my* name. Fortunately I have no plans to marry or sprog anytime soon, as it would sound ridiclous were I to double-barrell it with my partner's.